I am fascinated by this article which I read the other morning. From reading it I learned that it is extremely common in Afghanistan for parents to dress their little girls as boys. They do this for any number of reasons - to increase social status, to have another family member who can work, to have help running errands. It is extremely interesting, educational, and comes with pictures! Everybody should read it.
In Afghanistan it is shameful and neighbors pity you if you have only daughters. It is also thought that women can control what gender their baby is going to be - thus putting the mothers in danger of abuse after giving birth to girls. It seems also that the women who have a history of dressing as boys in their youth are the women who are able to make large career steps. For instance, a female member of Parliament dressed as a boy until it was time for her to marry. She and her husband had their third daughter do the same. They asked her, "Do you want to bicycle and swim and do all the things boys do? Do you want to be like Daddy?" The little girl did not hesitate to say "Yes!"
I feel like I should be outright disgusted and outraged by the cross-dressing phenomen which seems to have swept Afghanistan, but I find it amazing. The origin of the tradition makes complete sense to me, but it is so far outside my world experience that I would never even think of it happening. My impression of women cross-dressing out of desperation is that it happens in fictional stories which deal with how "backwards" things were a long time ago. Think Mulan or the Shakespearean heroines Viola in The Twelfth Night or Rosalind in As You Like It. It would never occur to me that a woman today would have to dress as a man to acheive anything...gender is not something I consider when I contemplate my own successes or failures.
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
"Gratitude is the memory of the heart"
I love reading the news and knowing what is going on in the big wide world, but a lot of the time I find myself being very grateful that I'm me and not the people in whatever article I'm reading (however condescending that may sound). I'm not sure how to reconcile the joy of the world with all of the terrible tragedy that befalls some of us. There are so many victims of hatred: those abused by church figures, war victims, citizens wrongly imprisoned. Yogic philosophy would remind me that the light cannot exist without the darkness and that truly it is all one in the same anyway, but my undeveloped mind can't quite wrap itself around that just yet.
Today I find myself being extremely grateful for several things. Namely:
-Having had a happy childhood free of abuse, knowledge of war, hunger, and lonliness
-Having never been accused of a crime I did not commit (on a large or small scale)
-Having a life which allows me to be educated, joyous, and (relatively) calm
-Having a healthy body
Today I find myself being extremely grateful for several things. Namely:
-Having had a happy childhood free of abuse, knowledge of war, hunger, and lonliness
-Having never been accused of a crime I did not commit (on a large or small scale)
-Having a life which allows me to be educated, joyous, and (relatively) calm
-Having a healthy body
Monday, September 13, 2010
Because their words had forked no lightning...
Dear Blog,
I must apologize for having neglected you the past couple weeks. Sometimes my thoughts get all jumbled up together and I have a hard time paying attention to any of them long enough to make sense of them. I then go into "survival mode" and just try and get through the operations of each day the best I can, without any energy or will to decompress at the end of it all.
Lyall is gone, it's always hard when he goes and it always kind of zaps a little energy from my soul and takes a bit of time to recover. Getting over that little bit of heartbreak kept me from you as well dear blog.
My mind has been blown by a lot of new philosophy lately, and its still marinating for the time being. A lot of it has to do with acceptance, judgment, and freedom.
I have recently begun babysitting one of my favorite human beings, Lucy Frances DesRochers (who at the tiny age of 2 already has her own blog chronicling her adventures and her artwork). She is a fantastic and unique child, but she has the very common childhood habit of abhorring the idea of taking a nap. The poor child screamed like someone was murdering her for 3 minutes before falling asleep the other day. I couldn't help but think, "If someone were begging me to go to sleep, I would have absolutely NO problem with it." And then I thought about it and realized, though the wailing is rather traumatizing to listen to, there is something so wonderful about the railing against missing a single second of consciousness, the need to rage rage against the dying of the light.
And what a powerful message that is. I know the poem by Dylan Thomas refers to death, but if we view every moment of life as its own being, the meaning of light changes. With every moment of consciousness we have the ability to sink into darkness, to allow our light to dwindle or extinguish. Do we actually get more tired with age, or do we just accept darkness more readily?
Choose light, choose life, choose consciousness. It's so simple, yet so hard to actually achieve. I guess the point is that we try though, right?
At any rate, Blog, I promise to not neglect you anymore. Seems like in the next few months I will have lots to think about and write about and I think you're worth sharing it with.
Yours,
April
I must apologize for having neglected you the past couple weeks. Sometimes my thoughts get all jumbled up together and I have a hard time paying attention to any of them long enough to make sense of them. I then go into "survival mode" and just try and get through the operations of each day the best I can, without any energy or will to decompress at the end of it all.
Lyall is gone, it's always hard when he goes and it always kind of zaps a little energy from my soul and takes a bit of time to recover. Getting over that little bit of heartbreak kept me from you as well dear blog.
My mind has been blown by a lot of new philosophy lately, and its still marinating for the time being. A lot of it has to do with acceptance, judgment, and freedom.
I have recently begun babysitting one of my favorite human beings, Lucy Frances DesRochers (who at the tiny age of 2 already has her own blog chronicling her adventures and her artwork). She is a fantastic and unique child, but she has the very common childhood habit of abhorring the idea of taking a nap. The poor child screamed like someone was murdering her for 3 minutes before falling asleep the other day. I couldn't help but think, "If someone were begging me to go to sleep, I would have absolutely NO problem with it." And then I thought about it and realized, though the wailing is rather traumatizing to listen to, there is something so wonderful about the railing against missing a single second of consciousness, the need to rage rage against the dying of the light.
And what a powerful message that is. I know the poem by Dylan Thomas refers to death, but if we view every moment of life as its own being, the meaning of light changes. With every moment of consciousness we have the ability to sink into darkness, to allow our light to dwindle or extinguish. Do we actually get more tired with age, or do we just accept darkness more readily?
Choose light, choose life, choose consciousness. It's so simple, yet so hard to actually achieve. I guess the point is that we try though, right?
At any rate, Blog, I promise to not neglect you anymore. Seems like in the next few months I will have lots to think about and write about and I think you're worth sharing it with.
Yours,
April
Friday, August 27, 2010
Friday, August 20, 2010
44%
So I saw this on my friend Ashley's blog and was surprised at how much I've done - and at all the things I definitely could've done and haven't.
I know that my blog is filled with a lot of criticisms, but I love the world and being alive in it. There is so much to see and know, and though I have no idea why having done any of the things in bold above could possibly be important, they just are. I don't know ultimately why it is important that anyone acheive anything, but I do know that people are proud of themselves when they do.
At first after doing this I thought "I've only done 44% of these things." (Immediately I always go to the very Virgoan place of needing to efficiently complete lists and tasks.) Then I thought, well hang on April, you know there are tons of things you have done that aren't even on this list.
No matter what percentage of items you have completed on any given list, you have always lived 100% of your life. Cool.
Bold what you have done:
1. Started your own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band
4. Visited
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sang a solo
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a
28. Ridden in a gondola in
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught yourself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the
71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in
74. Toured the
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the
80. Published a book
81. Visited the
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee
100. Read an entire book in one day
I know that my blog is filled with a lot of criticisms, but I love the world and being alive in it. There is so much to see and know, and though I have no idea why having done any of the things in bold above could possibly be important, they just are. I don't know ultimately why it is important that anyone acheive anything, but I do know that people are proud of themselves when they do.
At first after doing this I thought "I've only done 44% of these things." (Immediately I always go to the very Virgoan place of needing to efficiently complete lists and tasks.) Then I thought, well hang on April, you know there are tons of things you have done that aren't even on this list.
No matter what percentage of items you have completed on any given list, you have always lived 100% of your life. Cool.
Saturday, August 14, 2010
Lying, Stealing, Blasphemy OH MY!
Several months ago I was sitting outside a theatre waiting to head into rehearsal. A young woman (W) about my own age approached me (A) and we had a very interesting exchage:
W: Do you mind if I ask you a question?
A: (knowing this was going somewhere fishy) Sure.
W: Are you a good person?
A: Yes, I would say so.
W: Ok, so let me ask you a few questions to see if you are a good person in the eyes of God.
A: (uh-oh) umm..
W: Have you ever told a lie?
A: Yes.
Why must we always view any other culture (or subculture as it were) as an assault to our "American-ness?" Why is something different always viewed as an aggressor and have to be offensive to us? Is it not possible to view this is a gesture of peace and unity after a horrible event? To me it would be a vastly progressive and beautiful statement to have them build this community center closeby to prove their peaceful intent. Let's get one thing perfectly clear: Muslims did not commit the horrible crimes of 9/11, terrorists did. Are all Christians members of the Nazi Party or the KKK? Exactly.
This "guilty by association" attitude toward Muslims has got to stop; it is tired, outdated, stale, and nothing beneficial is growing from it. Yes, it has been my experience that many Muslim people find Islam superior to other beliefs and do everything in their power to educate others on their faith. Yes, it has been my experience that for many Muslims dedicated worship is the main reason to exist. Don't get me wrong, I am not saying that Islamic states have not taken violent action in order to propegate their own beliefs, but does anybody remember that little event in history called "The Crusades?"
I know that many people, including people in my own family, would read this post and call me "Un-American." I would like to remind these people of a little holiday we invented called Thanksgiving. This is when we celebrate two specific events: the escape from leaders which would not allow religious freedom, and the feast in which we solidified friendship with the native people of America. We all know how things went down after that, but none-the-less we gather each year to celebrate our gratitude for acceptance, tolerance, and the value of friends both new and old.
We have all, as individuals and nations, been guilty of hatred and judgment of others. But I cannot believe that perpetuating it is the way to win anything. Perhaps my peer in the hallway only saw a "lying, theiving blasphemer" when she looked at me. Maybe I am those things, but that's not ALL I am, and I refuse to assume others are ever ALL I see them for.
If we could just accept our own ignorance we might finally get somewhere.
W: Do you mind if I ask you a question?
A: (knowing this was going somewhere fishy) Sure.
W: Are you a good person?
A: Yes, I would say so.
W: Ok, so let me ask you a few questions to see if you are a good person in the eyes of God.
A: (uh-oh) umm..
W: Have you ever told a lie?
A: Yes.
W: What do we call a person who lies?
A: Human.
W: (a little dumbfounded) Oh well, umm, not exactly. We have a word to describe someone who lies.
A: I think the word you're looking for is "liar," but I don't think things are quite so black and white.
W: Have you ever stolen anything?
A: Yes.
W: What do we call a person who steals?
A: A thief.
W: Have you ever taken the Lord's name in vain?
A: Yes.W: We call this blasphemy.
A: Right.
W: So by your own admission you are a lying, thieving, blasphemer.
A: (a little baffled by her gall) Well that's a very limited view of a person.
W: God doesn't want you to be a sinner, he wants to forgive you. Here is a pamphlet of our church group...
A: You know, I think it is really great that you believe enough in something to go out and try and tell other people about it. That takes a lot of courage and dedication. A lot of people are really lost and have no beliefs at all. But I don't feel lost, and I think we are going to have to agree to disagree on our religious beliefs.
W: Well thank you for your time. I'll keep you in my prayers.
A: How kind of you.
She went on to try and convert more heathens and I went to rehearsal where I lied about my identity, stole the words of someone else, and committed blasphemy at least against Chekhov if not God too.
---------------------------------------------------
It is impossible to open a newspaper or turn on a news program and not see something about the plans for the Muslim Community Center in the works two blocks from Ground Zero. To make my opinion perfectly clear: I find opposition to these plans to be ridiculous, narrow-sighted, and down-right prejudiced.Why must we always view any other culture (or subculture as it were) as an assault to our "American-ness?" Why is something different always viewed as an aggressor and have to be offensive to us? Is it not possible to view this is a gesture of peace and unity after a horrible event? To me it would be a vastly progressive and beautiful statement to have them build this community center closeby to prove their peaceful intent. Let's get one thing perfectly clear: Muslims did not commit the horrible crimes of 9/11, terrorists did. Are all Christians members of the Nazi Party or the KKK? Exactly.
This "guilty by association" attitude toward Muslims has got to stop; it is tired, outdated, stale, and nothing beneficial is growing from it. Yes, it has been my experience that many Muslim people find Islam superior to other beliefs and do everything in their power to educate others on their faith. Yes, it has been my experience that for many Muslims dedicated worship is the main reason to exist. Don't get me wrong, I am not saying that Islamic states have not taken violent action in order to propegate their own beliefs, but does anybody remember that little event in history called "The Crusades?"
I know that many people, including people in my own family, would read this post and call me "Un-American." I would like to remind these people of a little holiday we invented called Thanksgiving. This is when we celebrate two specific events: the escape from leaders which would not allow religious freedom, and the feast in which we solidified friendship with the native people of America. We all know how things went down after that, but none-the-less we gather each year to celebrate our gratitude for acceptance, tolerance, and the value of friends both new and old.
We have all, as individuals and nations, been guilty of hatred and judgment of others. But I cannot believe that perpetuating it is the way to win anything. Perhaps my peer in the hallway only saw a "lying, theiving blasphemer" when she looked at me. Maybe I am those things, but that's not ALL I am, and I refuse to assume others are ever ALL I see them for.
If we could just accept our own ignorance we might finally get somewhere.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Closing the Gap
I've had a really hard time focusing on my blog writing the past week or two. I have a few entries started, but I keep getting distracted by other topics and losing my train of thought.
What I want more than anything else is to see the world. Reading about the events in all these other places is not enough for me. I want to experience them, I want to have a frame of reference, my own personal context for things. For instance, there are many articles in the news right now about Ramadan as Muslims around the world eagerly look to the moon for the cue to begin what will be the holiest month of this year for them. Having experienced a community while it is fasting gives me a completely different perspective on these articles. I can smell the ocean breeze as it blows from the Atlantic onto Rabat beach, hear the call to prayer, see the empty daytime streets lined with locked shop doors, and taste the delicious feast had each night to celebrate the breaking of that day's fasting.
I think my imagination is lazy. I don't want to have to use it to suppose what other places are like - I want to know, firsthand. I want to describe with complete certainty the things that exist in faraway places, thus closing the gap between here and there. Nowhere really is a "faraway place," and I think that once this is realized, one has no choice but to gain a profound understanding of how badly this world needs us to accept one another.
I'm getting itchy. I need to travel.
Maybe I'll buy a lottery ticket on the way home.
What I want more than anything else is to see the world. Reading about the events in all these other places is not enough for me. I want to experience them, I want to have a frame of reference, my own personal context for things. For instance, there are many articles in the news right now about Ramadan as Muslims around the world eagerly look to the moon for the cue to begin what will be the holiest month of this year for them. Having experienced a community while it is fasting gives me a completely different perspective on these articles. I can smell the ocean breeze as it blows from the Atlantic onto Rabat beach, hear the call to prayer, see the empty daytime streets lined with locked shop doors, and taste the delicious feast had each night to celebrate the breaking of that day's fasting.
I think my imagination is lazy. I don't want to have to use it to suppose what other places are like - I want to know, firsthand. I want to describe with complete certainty the things that exist in faraway places, thus closing the gap between here and there. Nowhere really is a "faraway place," and I think that once this is realized, one has no choice but to gain a profound understanding of how badly this world needs us to accept one another.
I'm getting itchy. I need to travel.
Maybe I'll buy a lottery ticket on the way home.
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